I honestly wonder, is it illegal to simply unlock those things, if you have no intention of actually stealing them? It’s not like they use particularly high security locks. You can probably buy some simple lock raking or cylinder lock tools.

Is it actually violating a law to unlock one of those cases if you don’t have any intention of actually stealing something?

You sacrifice and sacrifice, cutting everything out of your habits or diet that may bring you pleasure, only for the sake of extending your life. Then at the end of it all, you look back in dismay, in the dismal realization that despite your years, you have never lived at all…

My bugbear with Mc’D’s is how they now always ask you if you are using their damned app.

I know I shouldn’t, and that they’re just teenagers reading from a script. But I just can’t help myself. Whenever they ask if I’ll be using the app, I flippantly reply, “nah, I don’t want Ronald reading my email.”

The ability to pay for subsidies has no relation to the source of the funds. What matters is GDP, overall national wealth. And Norway is only slightly ahead of the US. Considering the US’s far superior manufacturing capability, if Norway could go all electric, than the US certainly could have by now. Norway’s had to import almost all its electric cars; the US can make its own cars.

I prefer the conspiracy ouroboros:

Conspiracy theories do not generate spontaneously. They’re all crafted deliberately by a nefarious cabal of corporate interests to distract and manipulate the public.

This man needs to be sentenced to 10 years solitary confinement in a room with 100 electronically controlled vuvuzelas serenading him at all hours of the day and night.

<Pilots start looking for glitches>

Hmm, after reading my contract carefully, there’s nothing in there that explicitly says I actually have to wait for the passengers and baggage to be loaded before taking off…

I’m sure we could fashion some biodegradeable chains to hold them. I mean…you don’t have to hold them down for very long…

“Look at the racist things I saw down at the Klan rally!”

No shit. Why are you sharing it?

Executives that reject work from home should be composted alive as punishment for their sins against Nature.

Depends, are you an Indian prince that has been kept in isolation your entire life to hide the pain of the world from your eyes?

Submariner it is!

I just always imagine that those ads are the vivid hallucinations of a patient in a mental hospital.

Perhaps. But if that’s the case, then I’m pretty sure that makes Mac OS Eastern Orthodox.

What oddball OS would be Ethiopian Orthodox?

Linux distros are just the new “101 flavors of Protestantism,” complete with radical zealots who believe you will go to Hell for choosing the wrong one.

You’re assuming the law will be applied consistently.

I’ve come up with the most cursed business idea in history.

I envision founding what is effectively a suspiciously cheap home-cleaning service. Like a cleaning service, we’ll require access to your home. We’ll need a key or door code. However, we don’t actually ever send anyone to clean your house.

Instead, we let you do the cleaning. We don’t DO the cleaning. We INSPECT your cleaning. When signing up for our service, you’re signing up to have a cleaning inspector show up to your house at any random time between 8 AM and 5 PM. It will be completely at random. It could be months between the random inspections, or you could get inspected 3 days in a row.

The inspector will be a form of your choosing. You can sign up for an angry boot camp drill-instructor type. You can sign up for someone who will more have the vibe of a grossed-out boyfriend/girlfriend. Or they can send a team of older inspectors that will make it feel like you’re being berated by your parents. The choice of shame is up to you!

The inspectors will go through your home, call you a slob, and belittle your cleaning ability. We won’t make it too ridiculous. By default, they would just expect you to keep things clean and neat, not lab-grade sterile. But if your laundry pile grows, you need to dust, or the bathrooms are a mess? Well you’re going to hear about it! If you are present, they will shame you in person. Regardless if you are there or not, you will be sent a report documenting in disgusting detail all the messes and cleaning errors in your house. The report will be filled with professional-grade photos of your filth. And to provide further damning motivation? The report will be posted on the public internet for anyone to view for free.

Note: customers who are clearly using this as a sex thing will be dropped from the service.

Morning? You mean good forenoon to you sir!

They won’t even need to use terrorism. Right in Project 2025 is a plan to slowly classify any public existence or acknowledgement of LGBT identities as “pornographic.” And in turn classify showing “pornography” to children is pedophilia and worthy of being put on the sex offender registry. They want to make it so if say, a trans woman, goes out in public and a child sees her, then that is the equivalent of grooming an 8 year old child by showing them pornographic videos. Oh, and they also want to attach the death penalty to crimes of pedophilia.

They’re talking about rounding up 20 million people and deporting them. Do you really think you can do that without setting up massive camps that match or exceed the scale of anything the Nazis set up? And if you really want to move that many people around, you may end up having to use trains.

Oh, and worse, they have no plan on how to actually deport that many people. The Nazis originally planned to deport all the Jews as well. Yet they quickly found that there simply weren’t enough nations willing to accept all these deportees. Other countries aren’t obligated to accept your deportees.

So you now have millions of people in camps, costing a fortune to maintain, and no where to send these people. That always ends in slavery, death, or death by slavery. Whenever your plan starts with “round up tens of millions of people and put them in camps,” you can guarantee that a massive death toll is going to follow.