To keep it short: my ex-wife cheated on me with this guy, we divorced, she married him immediately after. Since January we’ve been co-parenting, she has our son (14 years old) for 2 weeks & I have him for 2 weeks. Her now husband is wealthy, and for the winter holidays they plan on going to the Maldives for 3 weeks (I agreed to give up 1 week of my 2 weeks; gonna get +1 week with son after the vacation). Apparently son has been asking his mom and stepdad if I can come as well. So ex-wife calls me and asks me if I’d like to go, all expenses paid by them, just to be with our son and have some fun - and let’s “put all the bad blood behind”. I told her I’ll think about it, but honestly I don’t think I’d feel comfortable. At the same time going would make son extremely happy obviously. Idk.
I know this isn’t 100% on topic but I recommend you want this TED Talk by Esther Perel about infidelity. It might give you some different perspective about cheating and how to deal with it. Take a watch and see what she has to say. She is highly regarded and a very helpful.
I do think you should go after having a conversation with your ex-wife and child about it. Talk with your child about what they hope they are getting out of it and set some expectations about you wanting to spend most of your time with them. Tell them you might be angry about the situation which has nothing to do with them. Do the same with your ex-wife and say you want to go but you might be angry at points. Say it out loud so everyone is aware before it happens.
You can’t fully disconnected from these people since you have a kid with them without hurting your child. Its going to be tough and rough but this might be a good crash course into your new relationship with your ex-wife and her new husbands. You don’t have to like them but be friendly enough in front of your kid.
Also free fancy trip. Count it has blood money for the infidelity if that helps you