Example, Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

I hate this for the obvious reasons but it’s especially annoying to me because my wife didn’t take my surname!

  • Letme@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    2
    arrow-down
    31
    ·
    edit-2
    4 days ago

    It is the most correct way. Even if she didn’t take your name, and even if your not married, she is your Mrs. Not sure why this would be infuriating, it’s the language.

    Edit: honesty, the replies below are sexist and masogonistic. Yes, the women that you married is your Mrs, it’s the definition of the word. And likewise the man that you married is your Mr, for the same reason. It does not matter whether either party changes their name, it applies either way.

    To suggest that marriage is ownership rather than partnership is disgusting, you should be ashamed of yourselves. Did slaves get referred to as Mrs. (slave owner)? No, they did not. Your suggestion is entirely inappropriate, and takes away from the reality that slaves had to live with. Disgusting misappropriation!

    Grow up people, you can’t change the language to reflect your personal biases, insecurities and misunderstandings.

      • Letme@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        Absolutely not, it applies in either direction, universally. I am Mr (wife) (wife’s maiden name), this is how the language works. Why is this offensive to YOU?

        • thepreciousboar@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          That’s not how language works, that’s how culture works. Mrs and mr are referred to you, not relatively to your spouse. I am Mr John Smith, even if I’m married to Mrs Amy White. Amy is not Mrs Smith and John is not Mrs White. They are Mr Smith and Mrs White. In the usa for some reason it’s custom that the woman changes surname to that of his husband, in many other places it was like that in the past but ia not anymore

          • Letme@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            2 days ago

            Per Debretts, it has been this way since at least the 1700s, not an “American” thing as you suggest. I’m starting to think this is just another social issue used to divide America, ie propaganda used to control people. And if it is purely preference in etiquette, what are you complaining about? The person sending the letter are allowed to exercise their etiquette preferences as well, right? Or do you also want to control people? Is this all just the fascists on the right vs the facisists on the left? This is how people like Trump rise to populisim, and how freedom and democracy die.

      • Letme@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        4 days ago

        Absolutely disgusting rhetoric you are pushing. My wife is my partner, and vice versa. The prefix works in both directions, with either my surname or my wife’s surname, or even my wife’s maiden name. You are whitewashing slavery with you comment and should be ashamed of yourself!

      • Letme@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        Absolutely wrong, this is how the language works. I am my wife’s Mr as well, even with her maiden name.