Iām sorry youāre getting downvoted. Youāre allowed to like things and dislike things, as long as tolerance and respect are given for othersā choices. It seems like youāre doing that here.
Acceptance for something you like and enjoy is pretty easy and natural. Itās a bit harder, and takes more thought and courage, to show respect and tolerance for things you donāt like and donāt enjoy, but you accept them anyway because itās the right thing to do and itās a part of being a human on this planet with billions of other humans. Grow up, lemmy.
OP was being honest without being derogatory. It sounds like perhaps they may have experienced some personal growth from watching the episode.
If OP hasnāt been around gay people who openly express physical affection, they may have felt initially uncomfortable. But thatās why representation is important.
Thatās why movies, TV, books, and visual arts are so important to us as a culture and as individuals; exposure to new ideas helps us grow and become better people.
I originally had it downvoted, but youāre right, they arenāt being directly disrespectful. Besides, saying it was a touching love story first and foremost is evidence enough that OP isnāt an asshole, just a human with human opinions. I apologize, and have rescinded my previous judgement.
That being saidā¦ Getting the āheebie jeebiesā from watching 2 dudes kiss is a red flag that OP has some deep rooted homophobic views/tendencies, which is absolutely something they need to address in their own time. Maybe not here, on the internet, in front of several thousand schmucks making dick jokes; but if thatās how it has to be in order to bring OPs attention to it, then so be it.
Iām all for having your own opinions, but if a same sex couple being romantic grosses you out while a heterosexual couple doesnāt, that feels like something you should do some soul searching over lol. OP might be a great person irl, but I do think itās important to recognize your own shortcomings and address them where possible. God knows we all have enough of em
I originally had it downvoted, but youāre right, they arenāt being directly disrespectful. Besides, saying it was a touching love story first and foremost is evidence enough that OP isnāt an asshole, just a human with human opinions. I apologize, and have rescinded my previous judgement.
That is awesome, and so rare in online discourse. I really appreciate that.
Iām all for having your own opinions, but if a same sex couple being romantic grosses you out while a heterosexual couple doesnāt, that feels like something you should do some soul searching over lol. OP might be a great person irl, but I do think itās important to recognize your own shortcomings and address them where possible.
You kind of lose me here. I think itās not my place to judge someone whether they like or donāt like observing homosexuality. If theyāre respectful, and show tolerance and acceptance, then whether they like it is not really my concern. Itās certainly not my place to judge whether they have āsoul searchingā to do. I agree that saying it gives them the āheebie jeebiesā isnāt the most respectful way to say they donāt care for it, but on the scale of ways to put that, itās way, way down towards the harmless end. In my opinion it certainly wasnāt egregious enough to warrant the absolute avalanche of downvotes and judgement that person was getting.
Youāre already showing incredible empathy and the ability to be self-reflecting. I encourage you to stop judging others for saying they donāt like the things you think they should like. Instead, we should hold each other to the standard that we are respectful and tolerant of others whether we like what theyāre saying and doing or not. Unless, of course, that tolerance is of those who express intolerance, but then weāre squarely in Paradox of Tolerance territory and thatās a whole other thing.
Getting the āheebie jeebiesā from watching 2 dudes kiss is a red flag
Ehā¦ I regularly watch gay porn and have no trouble seeing guys suck dick and fuck eachother but I skip past the kissing scenes because I just donāt like it at all. I genuinely canāt explain why.
Eh, I think itās pretty clear that some amount of homophobia is innate as much as homosexuality is. Some people just plain find it gross. As long as they respect everyoneās right to have their own lifestyle, thatās really what tolerance and getting along is all about. We canāt except everyone to like everything, so we should be proud when they put up with harmless things they donāt like.
I donāt think the argument has been phrased well by anyone but there is possibly something to it, itās just that āheebie jeebiesā is a really loaded and unhelpful phrase. I think a lot of people insert themselves into the media they watch, so if they are not sexually or romantically interested in men, watching two men kiss may not be a 100% positive experience for them, in the same way that watching two straight people kiss might not be the most engaging experience for a gay person.
If you watch the comedy masterpiece Norbit, the intent of the Eddie Murphyās relationship with his large wife, also played by Eddie Murphy, is to cause distress on the viewer in a similar fashion. Itās very avant-garde in that way
I did actually choose innate intentionally. While Iām sure trying to prove it would be an absolute bitch, itās not unreasonable to suggest some peopleās homophobia can be innate in the same way homosexuality or asexuality can be. Some people are just built that way.
In any case, I think the mechanism is somewhat irrelevant when it comes to my point. If you think something is disgusting but you know itās fundamentally harmless, well, learning to get along is what itās all about!
I donāt disagree and Iām not trying to shame or put anyone down, my point is just that itās productive and enlightening to learn these things about ourselves when we can. For me at least, it helps me improve in areas I find myself lacking, and meet other people where they are when they see things differently than I do.
Well said. I think itās important to analyze your own prejudices so you can grow as a person; but so long as you accept that they are your own personal views and, most importantly, remain respectful of others, itās not doing any real harm
Honestly, thanks for still watching it anyway. Donāt know why you are getting downvoted. If it was a touching love story about morbidly obese people, I would get the same heebie jeebies.
You are part of the change that needs to happen in the world, we canāt help what makes us feel queasy, but you both respecting their performance, the story AND your own sensibilities IS how we achieve progress.
You are whatās wrong with āprogressiveā or āleftā or lgbt friendly circles. Fuck your judgement, you pathetic asshole. Public displays of affection give MANY people the heebie jeebies, regardless of gender, you judgemental prick.
A love story without affection sounds hollow. The original comment specifically singled out an expression of affection displayed by gay characters in a romance story, they did not say in their original comment that public affection in general is what bothers them. That led me to believe they have some homophobic feelings in their original comment, which is where my response came from. With either original intention, be it a distaste for love stories or homophobic origins, youāre quite aggressively upset. I suggest maybe you donāt watch love stories if you donāt like public displays of affection, just a thought.
You are the one coming in here and being hostile. Iām just giving in kind. People donāt have to have personal issues to not want to stare at others making out.
You are just further showing how judgemental without thought you are. You have failed to mature and fundamentally understand that others do not have the same perspective as you.
Shame on you for pretending to have the high road.
It was a love story and it was touching. I had to look away during the intimate scenes as watching two guys making out gives me the heebie jeebies.
Iām sorry youāre getting downvoted. Youāre allowed to like things and dislike things, as long as tolerance and respect are given for othersā choices. It seems like youāre doing that here.
Acceptance for something you like and enjoy is pretty easy and natural. Itās a bit harder, and takes more thought and courage, to show respect and tolerance for things you donāt like and donāt enjoy, but you accept them anyway because itās the right thing to do and itās a part of being a human on this planet with billions of other humans. Grow up, lemmy.
Very well said, I agree.
OP was being honest without being derogatory. It sounds like perhaps they may have experienced some personal growth from watching the episode.
If OP hasnāt been around gay people who openly express physical affection, they may have felt initially uncomfortable. But thatās why representation is important.
Thatās why movies, TV, books, and visual arts are so important to us as a culture and as individuals; exposure to new ideas helps us grow and become better people.
Agreed. Well said.
I originally had it downvoted, but youāre right, they arenāt being directly disrespectful. Besides, saying it was a touching love story first and foremost is evidence enough that OP isnāt an asshole, just a human with human opinions. I apologize, and have rescinded my previous judgement.
That being saidā¦ Getting the āheebie jeebiesā from watching 2 dudes kiss is a red flag that OP has some deep rooted homophobic views/tendencies, which is absolutely something they need to address in their own time. Maybe not here, on the internet, in front of several thousand schmucks making dick jokes; but if thatās how it has to be in order to bring OPs attention to it, then so be it.
Iām all for having your own opinions, but if a same sex couple being romantic grosses you out while a heterosexual couple doesnāt, that feels like something you should do some soul searching over lol. OP might be a great person irl, but I do think itās important to recognize your own shortcomings and address them where possible. God knows we all have enough of em
That is awesome, and so rare in online discourse. I really appreciate that.
You kind of lose me here. I think itās not my place to judge someone whether they like or donāt like observing homosexuality. If theyāre respectful, and show tolerance and acceptance, then whether they like it is not really my concern. Itās certainly not my place to judge whether they have āsoul searchingā to do. I agree that saying it gives them the āheebie jeebiesā isnāt the most respectful way to say they donāt care for it, but on the scale of ways to put that, itās way, way down towards the harmless end. In my opinion it certainly wasnāt egregious enough to warrant the absolute avalanche of downvotes and judgement that person was getting.
Youāre already showing incredible empathy and the ability to be self-reflecting. I encourage you to stop judging others for saying they donāt like the things you think they should like. Instead, we should hold each other to the standard that we are respectful and tolerant of others whether we like what theyāre saying and doing or not. Unless, of course, that tolerance is of those who express intolerance, but then weāre squarely in Paradox of Tolerance territory and thatās a whole other thing.
Character arc, the good ending lol
Ehā¦ I regularly watch gay porn and have no trouble seeing guys suck dick and fuck eachother but I skip past the kissing scenes because I just donāt like it at all. I genuinely canāt explain why.
As a good exercise for personal growth, you should ask yourself why seeing that gives you the heebie-jeebies.
Eh, I think itās pretty clear that some amount of homophobia is innate as much as homosexuality is. Some people just plain find it gross. As long as they respect everyoneās right to have their own lifestyle, thatās really what tolerance and getting along is all about. We canāt except everyone to like everything, so we should be proud when they put up with harmless things they donāt like.
I wouldnāt say innate, that makes it sound like humans are born homophobes.
Unavoidable when youāre raised in a homophobic society and something to improve.
I donāt think the argument has been phrased well by anyone but there is possibly something to it, itās just that āheebie jeebiesā is a really loaded and unhelpful phrase. I think a lot of people insert themselves into the media they watch, so if they are not sexually or romantically interested in men, watching two men kiss may not be a 100% positive experience for them, in the same way that watching two straight people kiss might not be the most engaging experience for a gay person.
If you watch the comedy masterpiece Norbit, the intent of the Eddie Murphyās relationship with his large wife, also played by Eddie Murphy, is to cause distress on the viewer in a similar fashion. Itās very avant-garde in that way
I did actually choose innate intentionally. While Iām sure trying to prove it would be an absolute bitch, itās not unreasonable to suggest some peopleās homophobia can be innate in the same way homosexuality or asexuality can be. Some people are just built that way.
In any case, I think the mechanism is somewhat irrelevant when it comes to my point. If you think something is disgusting but you know itās fundamentally harmless, well, learning to get along is what itās all about!
I donāt disagree and Iām not trying to shame or put anyone down, my point is just that itās productive and enlightening to learn these things about ourselves when we can. For me at least, it helps me improve in areas I find myself lacking, and meet other people where they are when they see things differently than I do.
Excellent point!
Well said. I think itās important to analyze your own prejudices so you can grow as a person; but so long as you accept that they are your own personal views and, most importantly, remain respectful of others, itās not doing any real harm
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Honestly, thanks for still watching it anyway. Donāt know why you are getting downvoted. If it was a touching love story about morbidly obese people, I would get the same heebie jeebies.
You are part of the change that needs to happen in the world, we canāt help what makes us feel queasy, but you both respecting their performance, the story AND your own sensibilities IS how we achieve progress.
Proud of you, no sarcasm.
Thanks :) I wouldnāt consider Offerman morbidly obese, just chonky.
CHONKY
Watch it again, this time keeping in mind it werenāt real strawberries anyway because Hollywood
You are a weak person
Yeah, watching anyone making out gives me heebie jeebies but I still stare at them to assert dominance
ą² _ą²
You are whatās wrong with āprogressiveā or āleftā or lgbt friendly circles. Fuck your judgement, you pathetic asshole. Public displays of affection give MANY people the heebie jeebies, regardless of gender, you judgemental prick.
Based.
A love story without affection sounds hollow. The original comment specifically singled out an expression of affection displayed by gay characters in a romance story, they did not say in their original comment that public affection in general is what bothers them. That led me to believe they have some homophobic feelings in their original comment, which is where my response came from. With either original intention, be it a distaste for love stories or homophobic origins, youāre quite aggressively upset. I suggest maybe you donāt watch love stories if you donāt like public displays of affection, just a thought.
You are the one coming in here and being hostile. Iām just giving in kind. People donāt have to have personal issues to not want to stare at others making out.
You are just further showing how judgemental without thought you are. You have failed to mature and fundamentally understand that others do not have the same perspective as you.
Shame on you for pretending to have the high road.