29-year-old Daisy Link was being held at the Turner Guilford Knight Correctional Center in Miami-Dade County, Florida, when she met 24-year-old Joan Depaz, initially contacting him through the vents in their prison cells, according to WSVN7.
“You would knock on it and you can hear the people from the different floors. You would stand on the toilet actually to be able to talk to them,” said Link. “Being in isolation for so long you begin to spend hours and hours talking to this person, you know, to the point where it’s almost as if you’re in the same room with them.”
…
After Link and Depaz began a romantic relationship, Depaz shared his ambitions to have a child with Link, according to WSVN 7News.
“I always really wanted to have a baby. And I’m not gonna get to do that for a really long time,” said Depaz, recounting what he told Link. “So if I had to choose somebody, you know, it would be you. And she was like, ‘Yeah, we could do that.’”
Depaz and Link then hatched a plan to create a direct line between each other’s cells using bedding. Once they had established this, Depaz began sending Link his own semen wrapped in saran wrap.
…
“I put the semen in Saran Wrap every day like five times a day for like a month straight” he continued.
Link described receiving the packages, which were rolled up “almost like a cigarette”, administering them to herself using yeast infection applicators.
After a couple of attempts, Link became pregnant with “a miracle baby”, conceiving “like the Virgin Mary,” according to Depaz.
The Shaw-wank Redemption?
Edit: Or Sore-shaft Redemption.
I was coming on here to post: Sure-wank Impregnation but Frankensteining the two gets us:
The Sore-wank Impregnation
Huh, I need to re-read the Gospels, I don’t remember the part about Mary stuffing semen she got from the HVAC vents into her cooter. God indeed works in mysterious ways.
Anyone can be a father. But it takes semen in Saran Wrap every day like five times a day for like a month straight to be a dad.
I don’t know, I am more inclined to believe that they found a way to meet up and have sex, but they are trying to hide that so they don’t get into trouble. Maybe the facility is going along with it, so they don’t get into trouble either.
Congrats on taking on child support payments from your fucking jail cell, m’dude.
Still a better love story than Twilight?
“Did you love mommy a lot-alot?!”
Son
hand on your shoulder
It’s like this…
To save any other Britons having to search it, “Saran Wrap” is American for “Cling Film”.
Honestly we mostly call it cling film too
“Plastic wrap” is the most common term in my area.
And for the Australians, Glad Wrap.
Who says romance is dead?
5 times a day for a month!?
Where’s he getting that much Saran wrap in jail?
I got the sense that he was stockpiling his…product, and then shipping it over the border once he had accumulated enough for a proper insemination attempt. I hate everything about what I just typed.
Considering that sperm die pretty fast outside the body it’s more likely it was “fresh”.
I hate everything that I have read
Life uh, finds a way.
That headline just got wilder with every word
Hopefully these two never meet in person because their relationship would suddenly end very quickly.
That poor kid that gets born from this relationship though … “Hey! are you that guy/gal that got born from the prison Virgin Mary? I heard of that story years ago on the internet!”
Mentally ill people using a child for personal gain???
This aint the first time but people in this comment section acting like it is with all of that faux outrage.
Human condition for us on both levels
