I recently made a new account on lemmy.blahaj.zone, because I’ve been harassed and doxxed on my old account and I wanted a fresh start with a more lighthearted online identity that I could be more open about my gender identity on. I’d heard blahaj zone was good for trans people, so I made my account there. And yeah, autism@lemmy.world removed my post discussing neuronormativism from a queer perspective, but I hoped maybe “the trans instance” would be friendlier to trans people.
A couple days after making my account, I saw someone on Blahaj engaging in the tired old cliche of “I hate politics, there’s no politics on my social media and I want to keep it that way!” Well we’ve all heard the joke that the two races are white and political, the two genders are male and political, and the two sexualities are straight and political. Hatred of politics is a transphobic, sexist, and racist trope. And having sufferred harassment and abuse from people inside the queer community who “hated politics” and saw trans or nonbinary or xenogender identities as political, I knew this kind of speech was going to make bigots feel comfortable saying they also hate politics, and they think us trans people are it.
So, I responded to the transphobia. I started out by attempting to educate them on what politics actually means. But I was interrupted by the Blahaj admin Ada, who told me that politics is “anything I disagree with”, and that indeed politics isn’t welcome on Blahaj. This language was deeply triggering of my past issues dealing with abuse, and I knew from past experience this sort of thing is said by people who are getting ready to say some enbyphobic or racist hate speech. It is especially common for white queer people to talk this way to BIPOC queer people. I tried to reason with Ada, explained the history of the cliche, the trauma it’s caused many trans people, and the consequences this kind of speech will have on the community here, making us all less safe.
Ada wasn’t having it. She minimised my concerns by reducing them to my personal trauma while ignoring my wider concerns for others’ safety, and weaponised my PTSD to paint my opinions as invalid because I am mentally ill. She said she owns Blahaj, and she gets to do whatever she wants with it, and nobody is allowed to express a differing opinion, even one that protects trans people, because that’s politics. At the time I thought her concern was me speaking directly to transphobes and making them feel uncomfortable by calling out their actions, so I said I’d just report it instead, and she banned my account.
This behaviour protects transphobes, WILL lead to trans and BIPOC people being harassed on this instance, attacks and gaslights victims of trauma (my concerns can’t be valid because I have a mental illness), and forces out any trans person with a commitment to safety for the community.
The thread where all this happened: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2143969
EDIT: The person who originally posted the transphobic views on politics is now misgendering me and calling me a “guy” despite me being very openly nonbinary: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2319669. And I didn’t call them autistic at any point.
They’ve linked the thread.
The alleged transphobe would be Abigail Watson, and I assume our OP is “PM_ME_FAT_ENBIES.”
I honestly don’t really see the transphobia, which feels a bit shaky for me to say given that I’m cis, but it looks more like OP went ham on a person saying that they prefer to spend their social media time scrolling cat pictures, sewing, and fanart, or well things like it.
Ada’s responses to me seem very well grounded. This in particular stands out.
Honestly, I kind of feel for Abigail. I personally have a pretty low tolerance for news, political or otherwise. They’re always presented in a sensationalist manner, and often just outright horrible. I just don’t have the energy to spend on things that ultimately make me feel miserable, so I try to shut it out.
And as I said in that thread, you can’t simultaneously hold the views that discourse should be opt-in, and that spreading transphobia isn’t discourse. Nobody has the right to hate speech in a public forum without being challenged on it. And what Abigail said isn’t hate speech, but it is speech that will harm trans people. And Abigail’s repeated misgendering of me when I am very openly nonbinary certainly paints their refusal to change their language in a much harsher light
I don’t view transphobia as discourse, it’s just hate speech and doesn’t belong being platformed anywhere. It’s fantastic that you have the will and drive to engage in political discourse and activism as much as you do, I really rather envy that, but not everyone has that energy. For me personally, I need to decouple myself from the constant flow of hate that’s so easy to end up in when you go down those paths of political discourse, because all it does for me is drain me and ruin my day.
Now that’s not me letting people run rampant with whatever hateful discourse they have, that’s me closing the door on the world for the day and engaging in some self-care. Perhaps I’m projecting, but that’s how I read Abigail as well.
I agree that we need to close the door on that torrent of hate. And when Abigail said she hated politics, she opened that door. I want it closed again. I want us to stop engaging in dangerous speech that legitimises hate.
You’re putting words in people’s mouths. They didn’t say that they hate politics, but that they want time off from it. Not all of us can put up with a constant torrent of racism, misogyny, transphobia and homophobia. It’s okay to want to have safe spaces away from that, and that in no way means you endorse the things you’re trying to avoid.